I will do my best to make a long story short here. At the age of 16 I was told that I would never be able to have children. Of course at that age, my response was “fine, I don’t want kids anyways”. About 6 months before Wally & I were married I went to a new doctor that told me that I would probably be able to have babies. After hearing that I realized that the “fine, I don’t want kids anyways” thing was just a defense mechanism. By the time we were married Wally and I were both excited to start a family, with some occasional hesitation on my part. After trying for a couple of years without success we were referred to a fertility clinic. We had a treatment plan, but were both a little uneasy about it, and still weren’t convinced that was our path. I managed to push off the treatments for a full year. Even before starting treatments, we started talking about adoption – a little more and more each month. Once we started treatments, which I HATED, God kept putting adoption on our hearts. Everything went pretty good for the first couple of months, but didn’t result in a baby. The night before I went in for my 3rd treatment, we just sat down and prayed really hard. We told God that we really felt he was putting adoption on our hearts, but we wish he would make it clearer. Ask and you shall receive! I went in for my appointment and they couldn’t even finish the treatment – the drugs were doing the complete opposite of what they were supposed to do. That was a very bittersweet moment. We mourned the fact that we wouldn’t have a biological child, but we knew that our prayers had been answered and that we were being called to adopt.
Why
international/Poland?
When we first started this process we thought that we
would be adopting an infant domestically.
After several months of research and lots of praying, we decided to go
international. A lot of factors were
considered when choosing Poland. We
looked at program stability, healthcare of the orphans, requirements, and the
process. Ultimately we feel that God was
telling us our child was in Poland.
What is the
process?
We have just sent in our commitment contract to our
agency. Once they receive it, they will
help us find an agency in WI to complete our home study, and will get us
started on our dossier. Our
understanding is that the home study consists of adoption classes, meetings
with a social worker, a home visit, and some paper chasing. I am certain there
is more to it - we just won’t know until we get our packet. The dossier is a more intense paper chase,
fingerprinting, immigration clearance, and will include our home study
report. Once again, there is more to it
than that, but we are still learning too!
Once our dossier is accepted by Poland, we will be officially on a
waiting list for our little! Waiting
time varies, but on average will takes about 4-12 months after the dossier is
accepted. Once we receive a referral, we
have 2 weeks to decide if we accept it.
After we accept it and Poland approves our acceptance, we will receive
travel dates to go to Poland and meet our little. On our first trip, we will only be there for
about a week. The reason for this visit
is to meet the little, confirm our acceptance, and begin the adoption
proceedings. Then comes the part that I
am dreading most – leaving without my little.
There will be about 2-4 months between our 1st and 2nd
trip. Our 2nd trip will be
4-6 weeks long. This is for the bonding
process, court dates, and the waiting period. Finally, after all of that, we
will come home as a family!
How many children
are you adopting?
We will be adopting 1-2 children. We have told the agency that we are open to
adopting a sibling set.
Boy or Girl?
It will be a surprise!
We have opted to take either.
How old will they
be?
They will be 1-3yrs old.
If they are referred to us at 1, they most likely won’t be home until
16-20 months.
Will they be
healthy?
Yes, our child will be healthy. Coming from an orphanage, it is to be
expected that they will have some developmental delays. Based on experiences that others have shared
with us, they tend to overcome these delays within the first year of being
home. Wally and I are not concerned
about this and look forward to playing with all of the fun developmental/educational
toys! Wally and I have shared with our
agency that we are open to taking a child with some minor and/or correctible needs. We were given the opportunity to indicate what
we thought we can handle, and what we could not. We will not know what, if any
needs our little will have until we receive our referral. We know that whatever child God blesses us
with will be perfect for our family!
Is it expensive?
Yes. Wally and I
knew that adoption was going to be expensive.
Seeing the agency numbers for the first time was a bit overwhelming, but
seemed manageable. After swallowing that
number, we started adding in all of the other expenses such as time off work (I
cannot use maternity leave), travel expenses, and the paper chase. When it is all said and done, the number was
much bigger than we had anticipated.
However, knowing this is what God is calling us to do, we know he will
provide a way for us.How can you afford it?
The cost is quite large, and as things were when we made the decision to adopt, we would not have been able to afford it. We have made some changes in our lives such as me working a 2nd job, budget reductions, going on a cash budget and saving our change. Even with the changes we have made, it appears we will still fall short. To help cover the shortfall, we are doing a few different fundraisers.
·
Amazon Affiliate
– If you order from Amazon, please use the Amazon Widget on the right side of
this blog. The same products at the same
prices are available, but if you order using our widget a portion of your
purchase will be donated to our adoption fund. Please share this with your
friends and family!
·
Puzzle
Pieces – We have purchased a large, blank puzzle and are selling the pieces
for $10 each. We can either write your
name on it for you, or we are happy to send it to you so you can decorate your
piece. When the puzzle is complete, we
will glue it, frame it, and hang it in the little’s room. This way they can see all of the people that
helped to bring them home. If you are
interested in a puzzle piece, please email me at afrancis1024@gmail.com.
·
Fundraising
Events – We haven’t decided when, and we haven’t decided what kind of
event, but we are planning to do one in Rockford, and one in the Madison area. We are currently accepting donations for
silent auction items for these events. Our hope is to create an event that can
be repeated annually. This first year
all proceeds will go towards our adoption cost.
The years to follow, we would like to use the event to raise orphan
awareness and the proceeds would go to another local family trying to adopt. We
will keep you posted, so keep your eyes and ears open!
·
Fundraising
Sale – My mom has been very hard at work collecting donations for a
fundraising sale that she is having for us.
Wally & I would like to thank all of those who have donated their
items and my mom for doing it. We will
post once she has decided on a date.
·
PayPal
Donations – If you wish to make a donation, we have a donate button on the
right side of this blog.
Are you crazy?
Yes, we are indeed crazy!
Crazy in love with our child that we haven’t even met yet. Yes, we understand that it is quite the
process and very expensive. However,
there isn’t anything we wouldn’t do or pay to ensure our little is safe, happy,
and HOME!!!Thank you for your continued payers & support!
I love your story!
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