Sunday, January 4, 2015

The Highest High and the Lowest Low - Our First Trip

Wally and I were able to take our 1st trip to meet our boys in late November.  I don’t know what a 1st trip is supposed to be like, but I can’t imagine it going any better.  It was so awesome and Wally and I are so in love with these little boys!  They are definitely meant to be a part of our family.

On Monday, November 17th we left Warsaw and made a long drive to meet an adoption government official and the social worker.  After a brief meeting with them, we were on the road again making a 90 minute drive to get to the orphanage.  The boys knew that there were visitors coming, so when we arrived there was a whole group of them waiting to greet us in the entry way.  We got to spend a little time with them and then sat down for a chat with their caregivers.  We learned a lot more about their situation prior to coming to the orphanage and all of the progress they have made since.  Our boys are truly loved there and we are so very grateful for all of the wonderful people who have helped our boys since their arrival.  After that we had to meet the director of the orphanage, and then we were able to come back and play with our boys for a few hours.  They were pretty shy at first, but they warmed up pretty quickly once we started playing.

On Tuesday, November 18th we arrived back at the orphanage at 10am.  The boys excitedly ran to the door to greet us – we knew it would be a great day.  We were only supposed to stay for a couple of hours in the morning and then come back for a couple of hours in the evening.  We got so lucky and got to leave at 4pm and spend the entire day with our boys.  We had tons of play time and were able to share lunch with them.  The weather cooperated and we even got to take them outside to the playground for a while.  Some of my favorite memories of this trip were made at that playground.  Their little personalities really started shining through as the day progressed.  When we went to leave sweet little Mr. K kept holding my arm and asking me not to go…this practice continued the rest of the week. 

Wednesday, November 19th was a super special day.  We arrived at 9am and our sweet boys were anxiously awaiting our arrival.  We were able to sit down with the boys, their caregiver and their psychiatrist and present them with photo books we had prepared for them.  It included pictures of Wally & I, the dogs, our house, and we added polaroid pictures we had taken of us with them.  When we presented them with the books, they were told that we were going to be mommy and daddy.  The boys were so excited.  I don’t know that little Mr. A fully understands it, but little Mr. K absolutely gets it.  We got an atlas out later that day so we could show them where Poland is and where Wisconsin is.  Little Mr. K immediately asked when he gets to ride an airplane to go there!  As his psychiatrist told us, he is so ready for his new family! We spent a lot of time playing with the boys and really getting to know them.  We were asked to stay late this day and put them to bed.  No arguments here – we were able to stay until 8pm and enjoyed every minute we were able to spend with them.

Thursday, November 20th was honestly the toughest day I have ever had.  I am not exaggerating – it was truly heartbreaking.  I knew the good-byes were coming, so the morning started with tears. When we arrived at 9am we were greeted with flying hugs (the best kind) and we had some time to play with the boys before we sat down for a final chat with their caregiver.  She answered more of our questions and shared her thoughts with us.  She told us that she had prayed for a family for our boys for a long time and that she was so happy how quickly we connected with the boys and how quickly the connected with us.  Needless to say we were all in tears…the good kind though!  Shortly after she had prepared a lovely lunch of traditional Polish food – pierogis!!  She had arranged it so it was just us with the boys so we could have alone time before leaving.  After that, we had a few more minutes of playtime and then the good-byes begun.  I did pretty good keeping it together.  We had lots of hugs and kisses and they even called us mama and tata.  The caregiver did an excellent job telling what was going on.  However, sweet little Mr. K saw no need for us to go get things ready – he was ready to come home now.  He ran to the door and put his little stocking hat on and was quite adamant that he would just leave now.  That is when this mama could no longer keep it together and the tears came.  Walking out that door and looking back was more than I could take – in that moment, my heart broke into a million pieces.  I pretty much sobbed the rest of the day and kept trying to figure out how I was going to make it through the coming months.

I loved these boys when we first started this adoption journey; I loved them more when we received their referral, and now that love is indescribable!  It’s like there has always been a secret compartment of my heart that I never knew about, but was always reserved for them – my heart is so full!  I thought that it might take a little longer to love them this way, but it came so quickly and I know it will only grow!  My heart remains in Poland with my 2 boys.  Nothing feels the same anymore – it always feels like something is missing.  When we walked into our home after getting back, it was the 1st time it ever felt empty.

We ask that you pray that the paperwork moves quickly and we are able to get back to our boys very soon!


“Every minute feels like an hour, every hour feels like a day, every day feels like forever, but I will wait for you forever and a day.”